This summer (at least towards the end), was the worst summer of my life. So much... and it seems so long ago. People often ask me questions. And it's really hard for me to answer them.
Sometimes, I do... and sometimes I morph into this cold person. Emotionless. Spewing out facts and things that actually happened. It's the only way I can seem to not do the other thing I do.
Sometimes I do... and sometimes I shed waterfalls of tears and can't get through a complete sentence without heaving. I know nobody can understand me when I do this.
So I try really hard to do the first one. I don't care what anybody thinks (about this)... what anybody says... or how anybody might see me. I know who I am. I know I am a loving, caring person. I know that I still love. and I still care.
Everyday, life changes. We often don't see it. It's subtle... like a soft erosion of the water to the earth. It laps and laps... and we think it's soft and cute. And then we notice a itty bitty difference. Where did that patch of grass go? Wasn't it greener last year? No matter how much we want it to stop, it just keeps going. Before we know it, there are more changes.
And that is life. And I cry...